Today I overheard some random bits of conversation that amused me while I was out and about. The first bit was at Forever 21 where one lady was telling her friend, “Uh-uh. If he don’t got a car then ‘Good-bye.’ That guy G—, he’s from the Bronx and he has a BMW.” I thought that was funny because first of all the woman’s words sounded like the non-melodic version of TLC’s song, No Scrubs, and second of all because, you know, it’s NYC and like most New Yorkers I didn’t get my drivers license till I was 24 and it’s somewhat of a ridiculous notion to have a car as a make or “brake” criteria for a relationship in this city. Plus if this guy is from the Bronx and he’s got a BMW… well I don’t know how much I’d trust this guy, you know? Ha ha, I can legitimately question that because I’m a 15 year veteran of the Bronx.

Then at Daffy’s (I’m a classy shopper) an older lady was speaking loudly into her cellphone saying, “I’m shopping, in NYC!” That was funny because, you know, she was shopping at Daffy’s. It’s like going to Istanbul and eating at Tony Roma’s and telling your friends back at home that you’re Eating in Istanbul!

Finally when walking along the corner of Canal and Bowery, across the street from the great Manhattan Bridge, a young lady with a Fran Drescher accent was asking an older Chinese man who was talking on his cellphone in Chinese, “Is that the Brooklyn Bridge?” She asked at least twice and the fact that he wasn’t responding to her one could have made a very fair assumption that this Chinese man did not speak English. The girl looked annoyed as if she knew he understood her and that he could give her the right answer if he only paid attention to her. As I walked by I assumed that since we were all strangers on the street, giving directions is an open invitation for all so I chimed in with my two valuable cents of knowledge and said into the air, “It’s the Manhattan Bridge.” But the girl continued to stare at the Chinese man, expecting the answer to come from him. I said it again as I walked away but unfortunately the young girl still seemed to expect the answer from this man only. “Unless he starts paying attention to me, he is really gonna get it,” was what my womanly senses detected from this angry lady. Too bad she was taking her diva attitude out on some unsuspecting non-english speaking immigrant. I thought the situation was funny because if one looked at the entrance of the bridge, there is a big sign that says “Manhattan Bridge” and an arrow that points exactly at it’s looming entrance. I also found the situation funny because my god, to confuse the Manhattan and Brooklyn bridges is like confusing which anatomical hole does which. They’re just completely different! The Manhattan is an ugly, industrial looking bridge although excellent for biking over, and the Brooklyn Bridge is a beautiful work of architecture but a pain to bike over because of pedestrians. Geez, I can’t believe that some people don’t even know that!